Last week I had the privilege of hearing Heidi Baker speak at a conference. I had listened to her sermons online, and watched a DVD, but this time was the first I've seen her in person.
I wasn't disappointed, (far from it!), but it was sobering. She's not the kind of person you can take lightly. Her life is poured out for Jesus, to an extent that is scary. It reminded me of a conversation after mother Theresa died. The other person couldn't understand why people were much more upset that Princess Diana had died the previous week. I felt that the disproportionate reaction was because they somehow identified with the Princess, and they wanted to be her, while they admired and respected Mother Theresa, but they didn't want to actually be her. The woman I was speaking to protested this interpretation. "I do, I want to be like Mother Theresa!" she proclaimed. "OK, I said, then go take over her work, and be like her, and live in poverty, and care for the poorest of the poor." "Oh no," she said, "I can't do that."
Listening to Heidi Baker was sort of like that. I may say that I want to be like her, but I don't really want to change my life that much. I'm obsessed with planning for my Mozambique trip, where I will be taking on a 3rd world lifestyle for two weeks. But I know that after that time, I will return home. There is a big difference between a visit and a life. But it is not just a matter of geography, or even of money. It's more a question of priority and focus. That kind of poured out life is not just beyond my comfort zone, it's beyond my comprehension. But I can't get it out of my mind.
Anyway, here was her message:
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It's in your weakness that we are made strong. God doesn't look for the able or the intelligent (although he can use them) -- he uses the yielded.
God says "I'm not going to steal you, I'm going to woo you until you have no other desire than to lay your life on the altar."
In the eyes of the wise I choose to yield whatever it is, whether it is coherency or whatever, I choose to yield...
Say "take me, Jesus, like a little paintbrush. Take me and paint a picture for your glory."
I yield to you, God, and I say 'Lord, I choose you, and I choose to get rid of everything else, everything that stands in the way. Whatever is hindering, strip it out.'
Sometimes I'm tempted to apologize for being so undone. Papa says don't do that[apologize], it would dishonor him.
You know that God has put something inside of you that says go forth in love -- but it is the manner in which you go.
God chose Moses and he had a radical promise, and an angelic presence.
There is something about the promises of God. I saw a vision, those boots, and I saw God taking the laces and saying I am stripping something out.
But promise and riches and angels are not enough. Deliverance is not enough, prophecy is not enough. Moses knew it wasn't enough if the presence of God wasn't there. Exodus 33:15
Instead of calling you to radical missions tonight, I'm telling you not to go unless you have the presence of God. You need the presence of the almighty God.
God is stripping people bare, and whatever can be shaken he is shaking because he loves you and he wants a pure bride. He says "I am going to strip you of all t he things that do not bring me pleasure."
Hebrews 12 say "therefore...let us throw off everything that hinders."
You can't run the race wearing so many ornaments. Let's throw them off to run the race. Let us fix our eyes on the author and the perfecter of our faith.
He said "for the joy set before me..."he gave himself away for love. He gave himself away for the joy set before him.
consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men,so that you might not grow weary and lose heart.
The attacks have never been fiercer these past 18 months, but if you choose the joy of his presence you will not grow weary because you know that he who began a good work in you will complete it.
You are called to participate in the celestial realms, as brothers, therefore fix our eyes on Jesus.
Fix your eyes on Jesus and stand. Choose joy. And choose to get rid of everything that hinders you from the joy of his presence.
The Israelites stripped off their ornaments.
Heidi goes into the presence, but then Jesus sends her out to t he darkness to call in his bride.
Moses spoke to god face to face as a man speaks to his friend. Jesus wants intimacy with us.
Don't focus on the snake, focus on the one who has t he power. Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.
Moses craved the presence of God, and God said his presence would go with them, and he would give them rest.
All strength and anointing and fruitfulness flows out of intimacy. Choose to rest.
Exodus 33:15 shows Moses' understanding of the importance of the presence of God. If we go without God's presence they won't know that we are God's people. If the presence of God goes with us, darkness cannot resist.
What does intimacy look like? Radical, ceaseless, bottomless love in the face of hatred, and in the face of those who live in darkness. That's what we are called to carry.
