Yet another opportunity for humility

I was going to title this blog "another opportunity for humility", but then my computer informed me that I've already used that title. Perhaps someday I will become mature enough for all of these learning opportunities.

The famous heckler at the nursing home hasn't been there for a while, so I've become complacent. Preaching without anyone yelling 'Shut up!' is so much easier.

But whenever I think I'm coping well with the inevitable disturbances, I learn that we've only scratched the surface of the possible distractions.

First there was the week where the old couple in the back kept singing throughout the entire service:
Ann: Today, we're going to talk about Faith.

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer true
I'm half crazy, all for the love of you

Ann: Let's see what the Bible says

It won't be a stylish marriage
I can't afford a carriage

Ann:"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen"

But you'll look sweet
On the seat
Of a bicycle built for two.

And so it went. I preached, and they sang. It made it seem kind of like a karaoke competition. The aides tried to shush them, but they were having so much fun I didn't have the heart to squelch them.

More recently, there has been a woman who is offended by the fact that it takes a while to get things started, as we have to wait until they've had a chance to wheel everybody in. Each week, her pre-service comments get bolder, and more pointed.

Woman in wheelchair, Week 1: I can't believe they make us wait. They are so rude.
Week 2: The least they could do is bring us coffee.
Week 3: I'd really prefer REAL church.
This is just makebelieve church.

Meeting a Muslim

A few month's ago, I got a new consultant who is Muslim. I wish there was a manual for this -- it's too easy to be rude or inconsiderate by accident, and some of the cultural differences are not immediately apparent. In order to avoid asking direct questions that might be inadvertently inappropriate, I'd toss a topic into the ring, hoping he would jump in and tell me something, and usually he would oblige. For example, I mentioned that due to the combination of backgrounds on the team, it is a challenge for us to eat together, since everyone has different dietary restrictions. Just as I hoped, 'M' responded, and told me that he should be considered a vegetarian if we planned any team lunches. He does eat meat at home, but won't indulge otherwise, since he cannot be assured that the meat is prepared according to Islamic law.

I mentioned this to my boss, who was surprised that I already knew this, after a week. That was only the tip of the iceberg of what I knew -- 'M' was living in a friend's apartment, sleeping on a futon, and having to schedule with 4 people to use the bathroom in the morning. Even that information pales besides the details about the bedbugs. He showed me his bites each day, although they didn't seem that apparent on his dark skin. But that information wasn't really applicable to the team lunch, so I didn't share it with my boss.

One day "M' asked my about the various people on the team, and their backgrounds. Unfortunately, the denomination he asked follow-up questions about was Anglican. This church wouldn't have been my first choice if I wanted to make Christianity sound appealing. After all, starting a new church because the king wanted to divorce his wife so he could marry his pregnant mistress, is hardly a historic milestone we would want to boast about. But I felt that it was an honest question I should try to answer, so I tried to briefly give the historic context and was surprised to find out that there was only one point that seemed notable to him.

"Do you meant to tell me that Christians don't practice polygamy?"
"No".
"Not at all? Not even if a man can afford to feed both wives?"
"No".
"Oh". (disbelieving).

Of course, the conversation was made even more interesting by the fact that I was trying to speak excessively quietly, considering the fact that just on the other side of the partition was Olga, and I couldn't face defending Christianity against Islam and Atheistic Judaism at the same time.

Life became even more complicated when 'M' asked if he could leave the office for an hour at 1pm every Friday, to go to prayers. I figured that it was a reasonable enough request, and there was no legitimate way for me to restrict what kind of prayers someone could do, so I told him to simply remind me 10 minutes before. Then I suggested that the easiest way to handle it was for him to block out the time on his electronic schedule, and simply list it as an out-of-office meeting. He seemed amazed that I would cooperate with him, and to be perfectly honest, I wasn't comfortable about it, internally, but it seemed the best thing to do, although I'm still not sure.

Polygamy wasn't the only thing that we had instinctively different reactions to. He mentioned that 'a friend of a friend' had trouble flying since 9/11, because of the excess airport security. When I questioned for details, he did admit that it seemed to be due to the fellow's last name, which coincidentally (we hope) happened to be Ben Ladin. Personally, I could understand why a TSA employee might feel he should check up on that.

'M' has now moved on to another assignment. But I hope that during his time here, he learned that it's safe to talk to Christians, and that we're people too.

Mango ministry

I have to admit, that I simply can't figure out the best way to relate to the people aroud me, who are from various countries, and practice various religions.
I want to reach out an be non-threatening, but sometimes I'm not sure if my restraint is due to my wanting to show respect and consideration, or whether I'm caving in to the political correctness of the age (and of the workplace).

The funniest thing is that I've ended up being the 'snack lady' at work. The reason it is funny is that on every possible measurement, I am totally deficient in the gift of hospitality. But food is such a good way to reach out, so I've gotten the habit of bringing treats for the guys at work, and listening to their preferences. I'm the person who doesn't know how to ask questions, so I often don't know even basic things like whether people are married or have kids, but I know what they like to eat.

Most of my co-workers are Hindu. Some are vegetarians, some eat meat (except for beef) and some are 'eggetarians' -- they don't eat meat, but do eat eggs and milk. They are all becoming vicarious fans of Trader Joe's. I alternate between bringing chocolate (which almost everyone likes, although the Indians don't like chocolate-mint), caramel cashew cookies ('K's favorite, but also enjoyed by many others), and the most unusual offering -- chili coated dried mango. This is 'H's favorite, since he doesn't care for sweets. The Americans generally don't like the chili-mango (actually, they won't usually even taste it). The Indians keep asking me where I get it from, which is how I know they really like it. 'S' is Chinese, and doesn't care for sweet snacks either, but his preference is salty rather than sweet, so occasionally I bring pretzels instead.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm doing this, but it seems like such a simple way to connect. And the other day I realized that the mango ministry was really making a mark. After making my rounds, one of the guys announced: "I think maybe you are an angel". I briefly considered whether this was an opportunity to correct some theology, but then realized that it was a better opportunity to simply say 'Thank you'.