Who would have thought?

As the year winds down, I keep thinking about some of the surprising things my co-workers have said recently.

K (from Pakistan) mildly explained that 9/11 was a hoax perpetrated by the US government. He seemed to feel that it was rather unfair propaganda that had caused Americans to believe that Al Qaeda was involved. He claimed that the 'real' pictures of the pentagon proved that the explosion was not caused by a plane. It made me realize how much our world view impacts how we interpret events. To me, what he said was totally absurd, but to him it made sense.

By the way, another co-worker, 'S' is currently in Pakistan, planning to get married. We've heard that she is safe so far, but may need to postpone the wedding. Please pray for her safety during the riots there. It must be especially unsettling since she is from Indonesia, and now she is in a foreign country that is in total upheaval.

Olga (the Jewish Agnostic) continued her confrontational gambits with an astounding punchline.
Don't try to convert me, I don't need religion. Maybe if I had some problem in my life and needed solace, I would want something to turn to. And then I'd probably choose Christianity. And then a couple of days later she repeated it. It totally amazed me that she was even acknowledging the theoretical possibility that she would ever find anything of value in Christianity.

'A' asked my my opinion of Joel Osteen. This was a tricky question, since I don't especially care for him, but I think it's important for Christians to not cut each other down, and I didn't want to appear critical, so I merely said "many people like him very much. For me, he talks a lot about how people can feel good about themselves, but he is a bit light on theology." And 'A' (a Hindu) replied:
I have been watching him. You are right, the first 20 minutes could go with any religion.
Once again I wasn't sure what to say, since the aspect that concerned me was a positive to 'A'. So I merely replied: "I would be very interested to hear about what you learn from him, and hear your opinion." So perhaps there will be some interesting conversations in the future.

And L (of Chinese heritage, but I'm not sure of her religion), asked me how I came to believe. There we were on the subway, pressed together too closely for me to even be able to focus my eyes on her face, since I was wearing bifocals. I started to explain that I went through a phase where I had an intellectual understanding that God existed, but I didn't know for sure in my heart. She immediately jumped in and exclaimed:
"Oh, that's what I'm like. I have an intellectual understanding but I don't really believe in my heart. But you really believe, don't you? " She sounded kind of wistful, but suddenly the train stopped and the conversation was over.

In any event, I have inadvertently come up with a great conversation starter. Every day I listen to a podcast of the Bible on my iPod (I don't always pay good attention to it, but that's a different topic). Anyway, people love to ask what I'm listening to, and they are sometimes a bit taken aback to hear that it is the Bible, but they tend to pop up with comments months later (like the ones from 'A' and 'L' above).

Merry Christmas

Sometimes it's hard to find Christmas in the middle of the political correctness, the materialism, and the Santa industry. Even Christmas carols are getting rare, replaced by seasonal jingles about reindeer, snow and chestnuts. I have to keep reminding myself that we are celebrating the miracle and the mystery of the incarnation.

As usual, I trimmed down my gift list by buying for only a handful of people, and giving the other people the honor of donations in their name to World Vision. This year we gave a pig, a sheep, an orchard, 5 ducks, a couple of chickens, a fishing kit, tools for farmers, and educational support. It's true that some of my friends are disconcerted to get a card rather than a coffee-table ornament that sings 'grandma got run over by a reindeer', but I figure that at least the ultimate recipients are happy!

Things at work get weirder and weirder. The place is so politically correct that it is almost a lampoon of itself. The invitation to our departmental holiday party included the lines:

So whether you celebrate Hanukkah, Diwali or Kwanza,
Come join our holiday extravaganza.

No one seemed to notice or care that something was missing. It is definitely considered insensitive and unprofessional to say Merry Christmas (although you can say anything else). Anyway, I finally figured out guerilla tactics to spread some Christmas cheer. I made Christmas cookies, and brought them in to share with my co-workers. I walked from desk to desk, offering the cookies and saying "would you like some Christmas cookies?" and they all eagerly tried them -- Hindus, Jews and Atheists all found that the word Christmas didn't choke them when it was the title of a cookie. And soon I found myself surrounded by a bunch of happily munching Hindus who politely responded:
"Thank you, Ann. Merry Christmas!"

More from Olga

Sometimes Olga is so perceptive it's scary.

I am studying to learn how to teach English as a foreign language. I have some vague idea that God can use this somehow -- maybe on a short term trip, or maybe working in some remote area for a year or so when I retire. I think about going as support staff for a missionary or something. But when I talk to 'normal' people, (i.e. nonbelievers), I say culturally normal things like "It's time to 'give back'".

The other day I was grumbling about being tired, and Olga asked me how class was going. The previous night we had looked at actual jobs in different countries around the world. I unaccountably found myself a bit disappointed because none of them were excessively remote -- there was one in China, but it was in Shanghai (a modern city). Anyway, Olga immediately picked up on my usage of the word 'remote', and said, "why would you go there?". I gave some vague, neutral answer, and she immediately figured out the sub-text.
Olga: "You have to be very careful in those places"
Me: "Oh, I don't know, I think I'll be fine".
Olga: "No really, those places are very bad for Christians to go to. You are probably planning on being a missionary or something. Let me tell you, that is very dangerous."
Me: (disconcerted that she has figured me out) "I'd be there as an English teacher"
Olga: "but your real purpose is to be a missionary, right? That is very dangerous"
Me: (wondering how in the world she figured this out, when I haven't even admitted it to myself yet) "It's not as if I'm going to be standing on a street-corner preaching -- on the other hand, I am who I am, and I bring that wherever I go".
Olga: "Oh, I get it. You will sneakily befriend them, and gain their confidence, and convert them to Christianity, and cause them to deny their heritage."
Me: (silence...I don't think of it that way, but it's sobering to hear what people think).

A new place for female bonding

I spend Thanksgiving in beautiful Arizona, and had a chance to go to a local health club. Wanting to get the most out of my guest membership, I tried to use all the included amenities. Which brings me to the hot tub.

I felt a little like an anthropologist observing a foreign culture. Apparently, it is the norm to experience instant bonding. Seconds ago, we were strangers, but now we are bosom buddies. First there was the woman who was bemoaning her daughter's eyebrows. Apparently she had an unfortunate waxing experience, leaving her with skinny arcs. The mother was especially miffed, since she herself proudly sported a vigorous healthy pair, which she attributed to her Iranian background. She lives in LA, and constantly encounters people who assume she is hispanic, and try to speak Spanish to her. The last time she stopped someone and explained that she doesn't speak Spanish, the woman drew herself up indignantly and proclaimed "how soon we forget where we are from!" The Iranian woman told this story with delight, and as she exited the hot tup she turned around and proudly quoted herself: "I don't know what you are forgetting, but I have not forgotten Iran!".

Which brings us to the second woman. She kept complaining that the hot tub was not hot enough. She likes it really hot so her artificial hips feel better. She had one replaced 2 years ago, and the other one two months ago. When she finally got bored with complaining, she left, however she also paused at the top of the steps, to show off the scars on her hips. I tried to admire them appropriately. By now I was beginning to catch on to the fact that the top of the steps is sort of like a podium.

A few days later I encountered her again when I was drying my hair. She clearly felt that we were old friends, having bonded in the tub, and that she could ask me to clip her toenails for her, since it is hard for her to reach her feet, due to the artificial hips. I paused a moment, since I found the whole thing rather weird, but decided that the best thing to do was to consider it a modern day version of foot washing. So I knelt on the floor in front of her and clipped her toenails.

My favorite hot tub friend was a woman from Korea. She was thrilled to hear that I'm studying to become an English language teacher, perhaps in an Asian country eventually. Her face became animated, and she threw her arms out dramatically as she predicted: "you are going to be so popular!" I inquired why, and she explained that native language English teachers are in demand, and since she has lived in Korea, China and Japan, she felt she could speak for each of those countries. When I mentioned that I realized that I would need to learn a bit of the culture and language before visiting she was delighted, and wanted to give me some pointers right away. I tried saying hello in Korean, and she praised me effusively. Her next lesson was cultural. She warned me that it is important to bow to people, to show respect. And that people will offer me food, and I must eat it. (Luckily I like trying different foods, although delicacies made from insects and some organs do leave me squeamish.) Finally it was time to leave. As she approached the 'podium' she gracefully turned towards me, placed her palms together, and bowed. I staggered up from my seat in the tub, placed my own palms together, and solemnly bowed back.