Maybe, just maybe, I'm actually supposed to be who I am.

This quarter, we will be studying Paul, as well as Church planting & Church growth.

I started listening to the lectures about Paul last night. I'm seeing a theme throughout VLI. The lectures go beyond basic Bible knowledge, and pursue the implications. For some reason, I was really touched by what Steve said. He was pointing out the way in which Paul's background made him uniquely qualified to spread the gospel. As an educated Jew, born in Tarsus, but also a Roman citizen, he was equipped to speak to the Jews, the Romans and the Greeks. But then Steve said the most amazing thing. Just as God prepared Paul for his calling, God is preparing us for ours. All of our experiences can come together and uniquely qualify us to reach a particular segment of humanity.

And then I realized that my own background might be part of God's plan, rather than being an accident. In fact, my church has so much focus on recovery from addictions, that I've often worried that my lack of drug or alcohol history might actually be a disqualification from ministry. Likewise, there is a strong anti-intellectual streak in my church, and disparaging comments are made about anyone with a more academic bent. So I've often felt that I had to hide who I was, to fit in at church. But all of a sudden, I heard what Steve was saying, and considered whether my background might be part of God's plan. The fact that I attended a 'new age' school from Nursery through 12th grade never seemed especially beneficial before! But maybe it is. The fact that my favorite composer is Bach is definitely something I've needed to hide -- the very mention of Bach causes people to react by bursting out with their warbling interpretation of an operatic aria. It makes no difference that Bach never wrote an opera, their need to mock is not inhibited by reality, or by fellowship.

But maybe, just maybe, I'm actually supposed to be who I am.